Time Is A Bitch

I think certain people would claim that I have digressed from the “nutrition” aspects of this blog that I’m sure enticed them to be interested in the first place. Or maybe I’m feeling a little “Buyer’s Regret” for having spiritually purchased a buttload of alcoholic laced sexual depravity last week. In either case, it should be noted that if there is one thing that should be gained from this whole experience is that… time… can be a heartless bitch. No matter what you do, it doesn’t stop. Your parents can pass away, your child can go missing, you can test positive for something, you can lose a limb, you can kill yourself, if it happens at 12:00 p.m., 12:01 p.m. is going to happen anyway, with or without you.

Dean, the notaboyfriend who has been accompanying me on this journey is not doing that well on his weight loss process. I try to be encouraging because I know all too well the main antagonist of all weight loss intentions since the advent of exercise is… life. We all got shit we got to do. I remember when Susan Powter was at the height of her fame and being interviewed by Tom Joyner who was lobbing her real world questions in regards to weight loss advice a prevalent and slender White woman could give to a zaftig single mother of color with several children and the accompanying several jobs to support them. I remember her response was something on the level that those are the people who need to pay attention to their health the most because of their situation, which I always wanted to chide her for but quite honestly… is pretty true. I think a bit of scolding did happen, her 15 minutes of fame hit fast forward soon after, but I think it was more to do with the fact that she gave more of a “description” of the problem than a “prescription” to try and fix it. I think it’s easy and pretty understandable for a full- figured woman of color with several kids and not enough income to not put “counting calories” on her list of things to do. On that same token, I think it’s pretty easy and understandable for other walks life that are also going through arduous times to not put “exercise” and/or “health” on their list of things to do. I think of all the atrocities in the world, the wars, the violence, the floods… they all just seem so much more immediate and significant than losing weight. So you put those health concerns on the back burner and you just try to survive and pay your rent and take care of your babies and try not to snap on the Omorosa-like bitches up at your job. You disregard nutrition labels. You get that bag of Doritos from the vending machine. You’re tired. You don’t want to cook. You go to McDonalds.

But thing is… you can do all of that at 12:00 p.m. and you know what… 12:01 p.m. is going to happen anyway. You can rationalize your caloric intake all you want to, time isn’t going to stop and wait for you. It’s not going to show you any pity. It’s not going to care what your race, color, creed, gender, sexual orientation, marital status, financial status, height or gender are… if you eat five Big Macs in one sitting… somewhere down line… you’re getting a second chin. I was thinking about this with Dean. He’s going through some pretty arduous times right now and I do feel sorry for him. But the Big Macs… dude… 12:01 p.m. Just because you’re sad or upset or lonely doesn’t mean 12:01 p.m. isn’t going to happen. We weigh in every Saturday morning. Just because you’re going through some things doesn’t mean Saturday morning isn’t going to happen.

I don’t really have a “prescription” for that. I attribute it to me being a guy but the only thing that really helps me is just to tough it out. Every once in a while you’re going to get hungry. And if you’re living, people are going to piss you off. And you’re going to get angry. And you’re going to get horny. And you’re going to get sad. And you’re going to get mad. And there are going to be a million and one things to rationalize why you should down that entire pizza, smoke that blunt, sniff that line. And whether you do or not… 12:01 p.m. is going to happen anyway, with or without you.

So I guess that’s why I do digress and talk about my personal life, my sexual life, my work life. I am no robot. I’m trudging through this shit like everybody else. Step by step. Minute by minute. And while I do have friends and family who will take pity on me, I know time ain’t… nor will that goddamn scale. So I’ll go and have my good time, ginger infused vodka and all, but I always try get back. I lost 2 lbs this week. That’s has to count for something…

Weigh-in: 284.6